The code of Dung Beetle

Dung Beetle sat back in the musty chair he had found in the grimy room. He sighed. His first days of being King were not doing very well.
"King Dungbeetle,"Buggin said, hurrying in to the room."Lord Blueberry is here."
"Bring him in." said Dungbeetle.
"How is the war progressing, Blueberry?" Dungbeetle asked.
"Not very well, your Lordship."Blueberry said." I mean, we've shot 15 more cars in the last week, but that's about it."
"I see."
"I was thinking that we should make a code or two and then mail all the badcars about what to do next."
"That's a REALLY dopey idea, Blueberry. How would other cars know it? Still I'll make a code. No, you won't. I will."


Baddy mail was driving quickly through the dark streets of Badside . He nearly got to Shev's house when he ran into 7 goodcars, all armed with loaded heat seaking missle launchers.
"I'm o-on a diplomatic mission."Baddy Mail shrieked,"don't hurt me! Hurt DungBeetle! Let me go! I didn't do anythi-"
"Shut up."Moon said sharply." Yellow, Evergreen, empty him of luggage. The rest of you, hold your guns at firing point."
Half an hour later, Baddy Mail decided he was having the worse time of his life. He was hanging in Beeper's dirtiest, grimiest dungeon cell by his exhaust pipe and every once in a while a goodcar would come in to throw some rotten food at his face. If the goodcar missed, somebody else would try later.

Skeeper sat on Beeper's throne and read Baddy Mail's letter to Bop.
"It says 'Deer Shev, I feel lik it's definitlee opposit da. The badcars hav wun the war and that's good, don't u think? I don't want u 2 gather up our huge forces and drive the last badcars owt. don't meet at the goodcar pineneddle stor toda. Do u no how minee wepuns weev got. it's not ur folt. thank u, king dung beetle bug."'
"I'm thinking all that means the opposite. It'd be,'Dear Shev, I feel like it's definitely opposite day. The goodcars have won the war and that's bad, don't you think? I want you to gather up our small forces and drive the first goodcars out. Meet at the badcar wood store tonight. Do you know how many weapons we've got? It's you fault. No thank you, King Dung Beetle Bug.'"
"Ahhhhhh," said Bop.


Dungbeetle put a movie into a battered TV. It was called Muscle-car.
"Uma uh uma uh," the guy in the movie said." Asha pa no ima uma uma uh uh."
Dungbeetle found the movie enticing. He chanted the words to himself. Uma uh uma uh asha pa no ima uma uma uh uh. Uma uh uma uh asha pa no ima uma uma uh uh. Uma uh um-
"Dungbeetle, the goodcars are entering this building. Come on."
"I'm king. Come on. Uma uh uma uh asha pa no ima uma uma uh uh. "Dungbeetle yelled.
to be continued...